Life Event

With much encouragement from my wife, and the threat of unpaid bills, I bit the bullet and got a job.

I can’t talk specifically about the job too much, but I can say it is customer service but not face to face. I was optimistic at first but now finishing out my third week of training, the bad thoughts are coming – can I do this?

I am in a large training class and honestly? That is getting to me more than the job itself. I haven’t had this much interaction with people in a very long time. Some of them are obnoxious, some are rude, some are intrusive, some talk about inappropriate things I don’t want to hear, and mostly, a lot of them are rowdy and just distracting. I’m there to do a job, a job that will be hard for me for reasons that are only partially in my control and it’s quite frustrating to deal with everything else too.

Training lasts two more weeks. I’m starting to pull into myself and away from the people I have started to become acquainted with. I have to just be okay with that and let it happen if it is what is best for me.


Dear Fridge, We Aren’t Friends Anymore

We have a fridge full of food and I don’t want to eat any of it, even though I love cooking and anything I make will be delicious. I want to go out to eat instead. I find eating at restaurants to be very comforting. I think I want that comfort when I’m depressed. So maybe I am on a down slope.

There’s another reason I am probably on a down slope but I’ll talk about that in detail if I decide to start writing again, which I think I should.