I have moved!

I haven’t been here in a long time. I have a new life, a new diagnosis and a new blog. I hope you will come hang out with me.  :)


Don’t forget to be awesome,



Purple Hair DIY Fail

So I thought I’d share the story of my failed purple hair. 

A week ago today, completely on a whim, I bought some purple hair dye at the drug store. Nicole, who prefers my hair long and brown, was surprisingly on board. We went with Splat hair color. It comes with bleach and dye together. I was hesitant to ruin my hair with bleach, but I knew it would get a better outcome. 

So bleach went on my hair and my inch of roots took it like a champ, bleaching surprisingly light. The rest of my hair turned out a dark red, which was lighter than my old color. I was left with something of a skunk stripe with my roots being so light. Ridiculous. So I put on the purple, which was way thicker than any dye I’ve ever used and left it on for an hour, longer than required. My roots ended up splotchy purple and seriously nothing else happened. Total fail. 

Sunday I woke up and as soon as Sally’s opened I got Manic Panic dye in Ultra Violet, which is recommended by a lot of people. They are able to get purple on even on dark hair without bleaching. So I dived in straight away and had the most thorough and careful hair dye ever, because I didn’t want trashy splotchy color. I left the dye on for six hours, twice the time recommended by my favorite blogger who dyes her hair alternative colors. Nicole and I were having a few beers and great conversation so that’s the reason it took so long actually. 😀

Here’s me with the Manic Panic head. Looks like it’s totally going to work, right?

Wrong. It came out purpley at the roots and a brown red on the rest of my head. Here are some pics in different lights. 

So now I have a serious inner debate going. Keep bleaching til I’m light enough for real purple and potentially other colors after that or give up and dye back brown. Pros and cons of bleach city: cons-my hair will be damaged, it will only be two months until I have to go back to a natural color for my brother in law’s wedding, upkeep on this type of hair is tricky; pros-fun colored hair is so damn pretty and I want it! 

What do you guys think? Should I keep trying or give up and rescue my hair before it’s too late?


Sitting outside on my back porch, my favorite place to blog. I haven’t been able to do this in a long time because winter time and all. The temp is 66 and lovely. A little windy for my liking but I’ll take it.

On to news. I had therapy on Monday which was really helpful. We talked about Visioncon and how I should have a schedule for those three days, which I’ve been working on. Just in case I’m down that weekend and have to go on autopilot. I’m hoping my up mood will last just a little longer into that weekend (it’s the 26th-28th). But in case it doesn’t, I’ll have a plan in place.

I had an appointment with someone yesterday to be assessed for disability. It was the weirdest interview. A lot of my regular background, how long have you been seeing doctors for this and all that, but also a lot of like counting backward from 100 and remember these five objects and other odd stuff like that that I didn’t expect. I don’t know how this is going to pan out for me or when I’ll find out if my disability is put through, I just have to wait and see. I’m not hopeful.

In ridiculous news, I tried to dye my hair purple last weekend. It failed miserably. My hair has some splotchy purple but it’s overall just a light reddish color. I’m trying to decide whether I should just bleach it all to hell and do what I have to do to make it purple or give it up and dye it back my regular old brown. I’m waiting a few days and scrubbing the current color out to see what it ends up looking like. I’d like to have something figured out by Visioncon though, which as I said is only a week away. So I need to decide soon.

I don’t know what to do with my day today. I need to clean the house. The dishes are piling up and there’s toilet paper all over the living room floor from where Dolly tore up a roll the other day. I finally finished watching Jessica Jones yesterday, which was so good but didn’t have the ending I expected. I don’t know what they’re going to do for a second season. I don’t have new stories to start. I’ve been watching Breaking Bad with Nicole but I don’t want to watch those on my own, they go to slow for my liking. I should probably just watch some movies to fill in the gap between this show and my next. I’ve been watching too much Netflix though and letting other things go by the way side, like the blog and my videoblog, which I all but gave up on.

In other extracurricular news, I want to jump back in to videoblog but at this point it feels a little futile. I haven’t been art journaling very much either, maybe just once a week. I do still go to support group nearly every day. I didn’t go much last week though because I worked at the shop four days. I should go today but I don’t know if I will. Oh, I could read today, I started Lord of the Rings, which I’ve never read (and no I didn’t start with The Hobbit, sorry) and I’ve made some good headway through it. I thought I would really hate it but it’s pretty good so far. I kind of speed read through parts of it, something I usually don’t do but it goes a little slow at times so it helps.

Oh, The Walking Dead came back! Sunday’s episode was super good. I didn’t do a review or record my reaction or anything, but I think I’ll start back on that in the next episode. I really need to set up a new blog schedule so I have a good solid foundation to build the blog back on. Right now it’s just a mess.

Anyways, that’s all for now. If you’re still reading these sporadic posts thank you so much. Hopefully you’ll hear from me again soon. :)





Back Up The Roller Coaster

The last time I wrote a post, an actual post, was three weeks ago. I mentioned I was starting to feel down and that remained true until this week. Like magic, I woke up Monday morning feeling fresh and new and energized for no reason at all. I’m watching for symptoms of hypomania but so far other than having energy I feel fine. Is this that elusive baseline everyone talks about? Time will tell. 

In recovery news, I have all but given up on my rigorous daily schedule. The only thing that has stayed throughout my down time is I still try and journal every day and go to support group. Getting out of the house really helps me and passes the time. I’ve also been consistently tracking my moods in my planner, which I think will be really important in the coming months. More on that in a minute. 

In treatment news, I finally saw my psychiatrist. Yay! The meeting was short, but she encouraged me to get back on my daily routine, which I’m going to tweak and try. She also took me off Abilify. She saw no real reason for me to be on it and I was worried it was the source of my extensive weight gain. She increased my antidepressant, since I’m predominantly in a depressive state. My depression is about 50-75% of the time. Not good. 

Being at the psychiatrist was intimidating. I knew what I wanted to ask her about and talk about, but it was harder than I expected. I’m very proud of myself though for telling her what I wanted and in a way taking charge of my treatment. I have a lot of you guys to thank for that. Reading blogs about dealing with these situations made me realize how important it was for me to communicate clearly and effectively with my doctor. 

In regards to the medication change and mood tracking, I know that keeping track of how the dosage increase is affecting me will be important to be able to tell my doctor, so I’m going to be really diligent in keeping that mood section of my planner along with markings down any unusual symptoms. Going to support group every day helps a lot with my mood tracking because we check in with how we’re feeling on a scale of one to ten. Every day I have to take a minute and take stock of my feeling, put a number on it and say it out loud, so it’s very easy to remember and track. 

Today, I feel super happy and energized. Nicole got the house in tip top shape this weekend and I’ve been doing a good job of keeping it up so far this week. I worked yesterday at the sewing shop and I work the next three days and am actually really looking forward to having something to do and making a little extra money. Visioncon, the scifi, fantasy and gaming convention in my area, is coming up in two weeks and I’m on staff this year as a photographer. I’m really looking forward to that. Hopefully that won’t be the weekend my mood drops back down. All in all, things are well. I will be getting back into the blog this week and also starting my videoblogs back up so hopefully you’ll hear more from me soon!

Have a great day everyone! 👍

Frivolous Wants | Torrid Edition

I haven’t done a frivolous wants post in a while, so I decided to keep it simple this week and just go hunting for things from one store. I picked Torrid. I’m not going to link every individual item, they can all be found through that link to the main site.


A very good sentiment.


This sweater looks cozy.


I’m still loving pastels. I have a wedding to go to in April, I think this dress would be magical.


A weird little purse that looks like a perfume bottle. I think this would be cute with that pink lacy dress.


I love cats, what can I say?


I like to think I could pull this off.


So I’m not a serious Daryl fan girl but this shirt is fun and I always think I need Walking Dead shirts, has anyone noticed?


I never really liked shoes like these before, but I think they would fit into my wardrobe nicely right now.


I love yellow.


I wish I owned more printed socks. I used to have an Alice in Wonderland pair but I lost one of them. I think these Ariel socks would be just as cool.